Coming Out Of the Closet

There’s something in my closet that has to come out.

It’s been in there for a few months. Shrouded in plastic.

Everytime I open the door I avert my eyes so I don’t have to see it. Kind of like I never see the dead moles the cat brings in.

(HUSBAND: Didn’t you see that dead mole in the middle of the floor?

ME: Noooooo….what mole? Oh, look, that is a dead mole. Bad kitty.)

I’ve been avoiding it for several days, but I can’t put it off much longer.

It’s the giant honking linen tablecloth.

Correction. It’s the giant honking WRINKLED linen tablecloth.

And it has to be ironed before this day is over.

Because if it’s not ironed, the table isn’t set.

If the table isn’t set, we have no place to eat.

And if we have no place to eat, then why do I have a 17 pound turkey in my refrigerator?

So I will be ironing. And I’m very thankful that mole season is over.


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4 responses to “Coming Out Of the Closet

  1. Little Sister

    1. Have the cleaning lady iron the table cloth.
    2. Put the turkey in NOW!
    3. And don’t worry, it the 2 above don’t get done
    I have plenty of wine!

  2. Impressive cat – moles are tough to catch. You could rent him/her out,

  3. you just reminded me i have to iron that damn tablecloth. Rats.

  4. I hope you mean a DEFROSTED turkey… I made that mistake one year and let me tell you the table setting was the LEAST of my problems!

    I hate ironing so we go classic 99 cent plastic or paper table cloths… some of them look like lace

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