My addiction to cheesy reality tv is well documented. I fully admit it. It’s a character flaw that I’ve learned to live with. One I try to counter-balance by watching instructional shows like Iron Chef or What Not To Wear.
So I’m totally excited that the next installment of Bravo’s Real Housewives franchise is debuting Oct. 7 — one week from tomorrow. In this series, we follow around a group of 5 “housewives” as they do ordinary things like pick out new fringe for their pillows or shop for art to match their furniture. First, it was a group from Orange County. Then New York City. And, now it’s The Real Housewives of Atlanta.
At first glance, you have to wonder exactly what about these women is “real.” Because I’m here to tell you that there’s more than a few silicone implants in this crowd. (And don’t you always love the image of the big, honking cross nestled inbetween the fake boobs?) It’s like shouting “I can wear my dress as low cut as I want because I’m religious.” (Like Jimmy Buffet says, there’s a fine line between Saturday night and Sunday morning.)
Not really sure how much of that hair is real either, especially on Kim, the country music star wanna be. Note to Kim: didn’t realize that Atlanta was a hotbed of country music…you might want to consider a relo to Nashville. And I’m guessing that the nails, eyeliner and noses aren’t completely real either.
But the main thing thing that isn’t “real” is the idea that these women are housewives. Heck–two of them aren’t even married. Two are married to professional athletes and the other’s husband is a real estate investor. All of them are described as living in elite or upscale communities. Still looking for the “real” here.
But even if they aren’t “real,” they are “classy.” It’s on the web site so it must be true. I’m running through a mental list of all the “classy” women I know–looking for just one who wears a big gaudy cross in her décolletage. Not finding one.
In all fairness, I am judging these women on pictures, promos and brief bios. For all I know, they might be the most down-to-earth, humblest women in Atlanta.
Right. And I’m Mother Teresa. And I will be watching.